Shey, Kallen (Canon/Custum Jutsu)

Name: Hidden Mist Jutsu
Rank: D
Element: Water
Type: Ninjutsu (Hand seals)
Range: Long (30 meters high X 50 meters long)
Description: Allowing the water to be drawn out of the air by merging the hydrogen particles and the Oxygen particles the user creates a large mist around the area that is un-see-able for up to five feet in front of you though the hearing is not disoriented the eyesight is. Requires one post to charge, lasts five posts, and then seven posts to cool down on. This jutsu can be used up to five times a topic. This jutsu can not be blown away or summoned away by D-Rank wind ninjutsu.

Name: A Thousand Needles of Death
Rank: D
Element: Wind
Type: Ninjutsu (Hand seals)
Range: 360 degrees around the user and ten feet radius
Description: Allowing the air particles to be condensed with chakra into senbon styled weapons the air senbon then can pierce into the body but disappears immediately after hitting the target. Can be used three times a thread and only able to harm those minority. Can not be fatal unless stabbing in a fatal spot of the body in which they merely stab 1.5 inches into the body. One post to charge, two posts of cool down and creates a sufficiency of 100 needles if user is on the ground and then 1000 needles if user is in the air.

Name: Knowledge of the Scrolls
Rank: D
Element: N/A
Type: Supplementary (No-Hand seals)
Range: N/A
Description: ALWAYS ACTIVE
~ This technique is due to the studies of Kallen's past knowledge. She had trained and read these scrolls for a while to the most extreme. Able to know all acupuncture spots of the human body and also knows the fatal and nonfatal organ hits of the body.

Name: Breathing Underwater
Rank: C
Element: Wind
Type: Supplementary Ninjutsu (Hand seals)
Range: N/A
Description: Allows the user to breath under water for a set amount of time. If the user breaths under water two posts it takes three posts to cool down, if the user breaths under water three posts then it is four post cool down, etc.

Name: Wind Cutter Technique
Rank: C
Element: Wind
Type: Ninjutsu (Hand seals)
Range: Long
Description: Allowing the user to use a bladed weapon that then when slicing the air creates a vacuum in the air that then creates a three foot blast of air out ward cutting anything in the way unless it is pure concrete. It can only cut threw metalloid, metals, trees, and bone but not concrete, brick, or titanium alloys that are denser than steel.

Name: Shunshin no Jutsu
Rank: C
Element: N/A
Type: Taijutsu (No Hand seals)
Range: N/A
Description: While pulsing the muscles with flows of chakra the user can then jump fifteen meters in any direction she chooses. This also means that with such intense pressure on the body this makes the person in need of resting after five times of using the technique. This is a two in a half hours of rest (5 posts) to allow the user to perform another set of five. So to clarify it can be used 5 times then has a 5 post cool down. If used any more than 5 times the user is then immobilized.

Name: Flying in the Air - Fly
Rank: B
Element: Wind
Type: Ninjutsu (Hand seals)
Range: short to long
Description: Allowing the user to then be able to create a torrent of wind while growing out wings of condensed air on their backs they can fly in the air. The wings are impenetrable and unable to be crushed by anything other than a technique of the same aptitude, though the wings are highly flammable. This requires two posts to generate but then eight posts are able to be flying. This technique can only be used twice in one thread with a three post cool down. There are six wings total that are made total.

Name: Kiss of Knowledge
Rank: D-B
Element: Water
Type: Ninjutsu (No Hand seals)
Range: Touch
Description: Kallen will kiss an opponent to learn their clan ability and jutsu. On the first post of kissing, Kallen will gain no knowledge of the clan. On the second post, she will gain knowledge of the clan ability and E-rank jutsu of the clan only. On the third post, she will gain knowledge of D-rank jutsu of the clan only, etc. Based on the amount of knowledge she gains from the kiss, she will have to give up a certain amount of chakra to continue the kiss. The opponent will lose no knowledge due to this jutsu. Does not require hand seals. (In OOC Kallen is to have recorded somewhere what all she knows of this clan. If she doesn't then it is known as short term memory loss and can not be recorded again.) [2 post warm up and 7 post cool down]

E-rank: 10 chakra
D-rank: 15 chakra
C-rank: 30 chakra
B-rank: 45 chakra

Name:
Canon/Custom:
Rank: A
Element:
Type:
Range:
Description:

Name: Poisonous lips
Rank: S
Element: Water
Type: Taijutsu (No Hand seals)
Range: Close
Description: Creating a poison out of the moisture on the lips of the user the user can then poison the target of anyone she kisses. The poison is effective due to who this jutsu targets. If this jutsu is used on a non-shinobi that person is paralyzed for life, if it is used on a Ninja that target if they were gathering up chakra for a jutsu by performing hand seals that jutsu ends on that kiss and that target's arms are paralyzed until end of their own post leaving them only to defend themselves. This jutsu takes three posts to set up without hand seals but two posts to create with hand seals. Then it is active for eight posts then has an eight post cool down.

I can start this off by saying no advanced elements are given. They must be earned. So the first thing is to get rid of the ice techniques..

Ok, I have the techniques out of ice range.

instead of times you use per day, re configure it to times per topic/ battle. Avoids confusion that way.

Hidden Mist Technique. Take out the last sentence. It won't be that strong on the site to nullify being stationary to wind.

A Thousand Needles of Death - Be more specific. If it stabs a fatal spot, how deep does it penetrate the body?

We will work on these two jutsu them move to the next two...

Ok. I have formulated and did what you asked as such. Please do your second reveiw

Hidden Mist - Adjust the use. You can use it longer but needs a longer Cooldown. lasts 5 posts. 7 post Cooldown.

Thousand Needles of Death - Also needs a max number of how many created. I believe it will need atleast a one post charge as well.

Knowledge of the scrolls - One handed hand seals aren't allowed.

Breath underwater - I gave Haiechi a set breathing limit due to his bloodline. Your jutsu can't work better than his bloodline. Your set count is. 2 consecutive posts. One post Cooldown. 3 consecutive posts, 2 Cooldown. That's all you get.

Wind Cutter - Too powerful. Pick a set material it can tear through.

Work on these and we will continue...

Ok, I have edited all that you have listed and am ready for the next round

Shunshin no jutsu - is it 5 consecutive posts before the Cooldown? Or you just use it one and then a five post Cooldown?

Fly - 8 posts duration. These wings would be highly susceptible to fire jutsu. If it took two posts to make, is this also while moving? Needs a large Cooldown.

Bombardment - you say six wings. Is that how many wings you have for fly? It needs to be stated in 'Fly' as well. How compressed are the needles? And how many are launched?

Ok, please do your next review now. I believe I've edited them

Waters of the deep - still need a post limit on use. An entire fight is too long to make it last, even with it being forbidden. So limit and once per topic use

Death by drowning - this one is a no. Probably gonna have to adjust the effects to do something different.

Ok I have edited them and am ready for a final evaluation when you give it

You need to post whether or not the jutsu need handseals or not. state it in every jutsu..

Got it for you. Time for you to reveiw hopefully for the last time

I still just don't know about the S Rank still. It's still OP. It's just way too strong. Maybe lessen the effects away from death and total paralysis.

OK, I hope that fixed the s-rank technique